Why Yes, You Should Be Single!
Do you wish you were single? Here’s why you should be:
1. Monogamy is Boring
Casual sex with the same person over and over and over again is boring. There’s only so much experimenting a couple can do after a while. Once you’ve dressed as the big bad wolf and she as little red riding hood, and then you as little red riding hood and she as the big bad wolf, it might be time to part beds. Seriously, how far do we have to go to force ourselves to like sex with one another after a while? Should it be that much work? Especially since your cock swells three sizes when you see your next-door-neighbor doing yoga on the front porch every morning, and all she’s doing is standing mountain pose…in her sweatpants.
2. Non-Monogamy is Fun as Hell
Welcome to the world of adult dating, aka fucking whomever you please, whenever you please. Yoga girl adores doggy style. The postwoman likes it quick and dirty on the living room floor. Your best friend’s wife loves secret make out sessions with you after her husband has too much wine spritzer at the BBQ. The world is full of possibilities, my friend, and if you’re locked down, you’re missing out. To women, newly single men are like catnip – totally irresistible and conducive to rolling all over the floor with.
3. A Little Bit of This, A Little Bit of That
There are so many ridiculously stunning and wondrously different types of women out there! There are big beautiful women, little women, tall women, women with massive breasts, women with perky, unpretentious breasts, women with round juicy asses and women with asses like a new peach. And, as I mentioned in number two, they all fuck differently; some are porn all-stars, others want it shy, sweet and deep. Need I say more? The single life, my man, is much better.